Why Acceptance Is Everything, With Kath Ebbs

Why are peoples’ correct pronouns so important?
“The easiest way I can help people understand this is that, if you were lucky to be born cis-gendered and have never questioned the gender you were assigned at birth, therefore the pronouns people use for you as a default. How would you feel if everyone was referring to you as the opposite? Not very comfortable I would guess. Therefore correct pronouns are so important as they make people feel safe, seen and heard. It's also so goddamn easy! Why we convincing people? Just do it!!”

How does it feel for you when people continue to use the wrong pronoun?
“I have the privilege of feeling affirmed in my pronouns assigned at birth (she/her) as well as my gender neutral ones (they/them). With this comes great privilege as I can dip in and out of spaces. I must acknowledge this. I would love for people to use ‘they’ pronouns more for me but unfortunately because of the world we live in, it doesn’t happen often. It hurts, when you’ve finally found the courage to come out and people just ignore it or act as if it’s just a ‘phase’.”

Obviously at THE ICONIC we’re all about dressing however makes you feel good! How do you like to dress?
“I like to dress for however I’m feeling that day. At the moment I’m all about baggy comfy clothes in my day-to-day wear. Super basic, shorts, singlet, high socks and sneakers. Every so often I get this urge to be super glam, when this happens I’m all in! The make-up and dresses… come on!”

Can you tell us from experience how important it is for someone to be accepted for who they are, and affirmed as such?
“It is everything. We all want to belong. It is part of the human condition. Belonging and feeling accepted is a life force.”

What do you hope for the future in terms of pronouns?
“Asserting your pronouns to become more mainstream. I don’t just mean for Trans/ gender queer folk, for everyone! This way the community doesn’t have to feel a burden in asserting themselves or just cop being uncomfortable because we don’t want to make others feel uncomfortable/have to explain ourselves. The more cis people speak up the easier it will be for our trans friends. Oh and NO more Trans facing in the media!”