“Sorry, I’m Not Hugging.”

Navigating social interaction as restrictions ease.

“Can I hug you?”

Me: “No, sorry, I’m not hugging people…” *Awkward face*

So went the exchange at my front door this weekend.

I couldn’t message the group chat fast enough when we, in New South Wales, were allowed to have two whole friends over to our homes – the easing of restrictions we’d been desperate to hear – and the first of those friends took her tentative steps over the threshold last Sunday. A brief visit, before we went outside to an open space.

“I hate that I have to think twice to greet people!” she remarked. Not one of my close friends has ever even questioned if physical contact is OK, let alone been denied. Now every time I see someone I know, a beat passes where we would have hugged hello, touched arms, stood closer, even. Such is life now we know what we know.

When I’ve talked to others about the easing of restrictions, there’s apprehension.

“Two friends suggested dinner the other day – a normal thing for us to do – and I thought, ‘No, I don’t want to’,” says one. Even when life returns to something more closely resembling normality, it doesn’t look like most of us will be embracing all of our old habits with open arms. Literally.

Seeking permission to touch someone is not groundbreaking. We teach kids about it. Yet it jarred for a nanosecond. This was a close, and understanding, friend, so how do you navigate slightly less natural situations?

1. Set Your Own Boundaries
Heed the medical advice and decide what feels comfortable to you. Aside from that couple who were sailing around the world, hadn’t seen the news and were completely oblivious to Covid-19, you’d have to be living under a rock to not be aware of the global crisis. The expert health advice has been clear, so people should be understanding of you deciding not to touch hands or hug, both for your own health and theirs. No need to apologise for protecting yourself, your family and our healthcare workers.

2. It’s Fine to Decline
If something doesn’t feel right yet, like a dinner with friends where you will share a space and potentially share food, saying you’re not ready is perfectly OK. If you still want to catch up face to face, why not suggest that you each bring your own meal to a park or open space and eat together, at a 1.5 metre distance? That way, no cross-contamination. Don’t forget the hand sani.

3. BYO
Similar to bringing your own food along, if you want to visit a friend’s place but feel extra reassured, why not take your own drink bottle or glass over? I felt like I was being over-cautious doing this at first but I know friends doing the same – everyone’s been very understanding and even glad that you’re taking their health as seriously as your own.

Stay safe and do what makes the most sense for you.

BYO and be on the safe side