We Don’t Need a Date to Dress Up

Another season of The Bachelor is well underway, with vats of fake tan, hair extensions for days and the dresses. Oh, the dresses. (But admit it, when a string of intruders strut in, isn’t playing ‘which dress is your fave?’ the best part of the show?)

The contestants vying for the Honey Badger’s heart are so highly coiffed and preened to within an inch of their lives that even the most cynical of viewers would find it hard not to wonder whether it’s time to touch up their roots or get the yoga mat out. But, if competing with 30 other women for the attention of one curly-haired footy player isn’t your idea of romance, we hear ya. Besides, who needs a group date and a cocktail party to don a nice frock or two? We're getting fancy for nobody but ourselves.

You can keep your rose.